I sware I don’t know anyone like me. I’m obsessive compulsive over having my carpet clean. My brand new carpet is 1.3 years old…and it looks terrible. I’ve gone through 3 carpet cleaners in 2 years. I clean my carpet at least once per week. My kids are the messiest creatures on this planet and somehow they manage to spill something red or blue on the carpet, or grind in some sort of food.
I just got done carpet cleaning my house again for the 2nd time this week. I went over it like 6 times — thinking to myself… well if I just spend a little more time and get a little bit more residue out, that it won’t come back.
Sure enough, I walk in there and there’s a spill. Grrrr. On top of vacuuming multiple times per day this is driving me insane. God help me live for the next 15 years without having to be commited. NO MORE colored drinks! I’ve had it.
Thoughts affecting my brain…
How does somebody gain 3lbs overnight? Well — Jen can find a way. It’s called water retention, and i’ve been dealing with it bad. My eating habits have gotten so bad that I make sure what I eat doesn’t weigh much so that I won’t weigh more. It’s so bad that sometimes I won’t drink a glass of water, knowing how much weight that glass of water is. I’ve become a bit too conscious about these things and i’m hoping it doesn’t lead to a problem. Today I had 1 broccoli spear, 3 pieces of celery, 1 mini carrot stick, a piece of pepperoni, and for dinner 1 chimichanga from Mexican Gardens. When my brain starts to tell me that i’ve had too much food, I start to get worried. It’s bad enough that the fickle $10,000 object strangling my stomach tells me, but I don’t need my brain to turn me anorexic. I’m in this mindset that since I paid so much out-of-pocket for this thing that i’m not about to let it fail me. If I had it removed tomorrow I would still have no problems, because i’m pretty well trained from it. That’s all it is… a training tool. Gastric Bypass is a much more drastic option that I was almost ready to take, but opted to spend the rest of my life with my family and not run the risk of dying.
How can someone be anorexic when they are 60lbs overweight still? It happens… how do you think anorexics get so skinny. A lot start out fat. More than anything I want to be normal. I’ve been criticized my entire life needlessly by peers, for something that i’m not even sure was my fault.
Thankfully I survived, but many don’t. I just shrug it off as ignorance on the part of former classmates and others. Hopefully going on 8 years later people have grown up some… At least i’m good knowing that if or when I do lose the rest of my weight I won’t forget about where I came from. Some tend to forget and start ripping on people that aren’t so fortunate.
Ah well… been doing this since January and i’m not dead yet… plus I feel good and am down 85lbs, so not much more to go.
