Feeling Very Overwhelmed.

Published on: Apr 23, 2008 @ 20:09 – 
Well my dad is in the ICU, mostly because he was having a hard time breathing.  They told me yesterday when I went up there that he would make a full recovery just fine.  They have him sedated with Ativan and some pain medicine.  I’m glad he’s sedated though, who would want to be awake while a machine is breathing for you.  I once had a tube up my nose and into my stomach and it was very uncomfortable.  I can’t imagine what it’s like to have one into your lung and your stomach.  So basically the prognosis is excellent… although nobody knows how damaged he is from whatever recent stroke he had.  Apparently the left side of his body isn’t responding too well, and he has forgotten some basic things and self-care.
I am overwhelmed because now all of a sudden I have to think about the possibility of him being kicked to the road with nowhere to go.  He can’t come to my house because there is no room, and everyone who has been to my house can definitely tell you we are crammed in here.  Not to mention, our lifestyle would drive him crazy and his lifestyle would drive me crazy.  We have no room to store his belongings and my brother can’t just move my dad’s stuff into my grandma’s garage, she would have a hissy if she knew, not to mention the garage is pretty packed as is.  I don’t have a garage otherwise that would be an option.  I called the social security administration today and set up an appointment to see if he qualifies for SSI.  Even that, it only pays out $630 a month, which wouldn’t cover his bills.  They want information I can’t give them.  I have no idea what city and county he was born in, and I need that information (it’s required) for the state of Nebraska to issue a birth certificate.  Tomorrow I have to go to the FIA to see if they can get him some extra assistance, such as medicaid and cash benefits that would help a little.  That is about to the extent I am capable of doing, there isn’t much more I can do.  In my opinion, he needs to have rehabilitation when he recovers, but without medical insurance, they will just boot him to the street.  If he get’s evicted, then he’s really in trouble and neither myself or my brother are in a position to help him if that happens.  I am worried about all this constantly, it’s on my mind 24/7.  I just hope all this turns out ok.
May is coming up and that is going to be a hectic month.  Matt will be out of town for a while, which ultimately means I have no help, and no babysitters.  We are also going out of town at the end of May.  As everyone who is around me knows, Chris and Andrew are definitely a handful, maybe more than a handful.  To add that stress on top of the events that have transpired over the last week is something I don’t want to think about right now.