I hate posting such depressing stuff, but hopefully one day it'll be back to all good stuff. I had my second opinion with the other hematology/oncology clinic today. Now I have a whole new can of worms. Here i'm worrying about the debilitating anemia, and now I'm getting a mammogram and an ultrasound of my right side "goods" between the 9 and 10'oclock positions. I am not prepared to deal with that, I really am not. My mom has breast cancer, and I'm already bad off with uncurable anemia. AFTER she told me all this, I mentioned my mom has breast cancer and she was like, "ohhh reallly?" in a weird way. I'm scared that all of this now could be something crazy cancer related. I have to have a ct scan of my chest, abdomen and pelvis, and then next week I go under anesthesia again so they can check things out. After that, this evening, I got a voicemail from the Rheumatologist that I must call her tomorrow to discuss the results of my bone density scan, and that she is sending the results to my hema/oncologist. Those two were completely independent of each other, so unless the bone density scan revealed something suspicious, I can't imagine why my results would go to a blood/cancer doctor. My gut instinct is usually pretty good and something tells me I am not going to hear good news. Anemia has nothing to do with a bone density scan. I won't consult Dr. Google, but connecting the dots here is freaking me out. I know that if any lumps happen to be found that most of the time they are benign, but that is just not my luck. I need to find faith here because I'm slowly losing it. I have 4 kids to take care of and I can't even do it. I am truly scared.
Originally posted on Facebook on May 7, 2012.
