Nobody even knows I'm gone…. I'm happy and I'm sad – weird really
Published on: Sep 19, 2013 @ 16:11 –
I haven’t really taken the time to write in sooooo long now that nobody even knows what has been going on. I miss my best friend Julie the most and feel lost without her here and not being able to talk nightly. I miss my sister Beth, even though we went 3 months without talking because I couldn’t take her name calling for no reason, though I’m talking to her now. I miss the comfort of my last home in Michigan, I miss the security of that home, I miss the wide open land and the view of the sky at night, and right now, I’m missing the “autumn” like weather. I miss all the damn belongings that I didn’t get a chance to go back to retrieve. We got screwed over by Budget truck rental (the name should have warned us), and because we couldn’t go back and make the 1300 mile drive, we left our 2009 Impala and had to have it towed out of the garage and gave it away. We left our stupid little brand new home gym, some furniture, some kids toys, some power equipment, my nice new roasting pan (actually forgot that), and until I can find half of what I can’t find, I’m assuming it was left behind.
We moved to Florida on August 17th. Life has been a screwed up nightmare/dream since we left and I’m just waiting for things to settle. I can’t remember everything that has happened in the last 30 days because we’ve done so much, yet facing turmoil and confusion all in there too.
I’m taking applications for new friends, male or female 🙂 Nobody will ever be my soul mate best friend like Julie in Michigan, she always holds that spot, but a great friend that shares my interests is always great to have. Anybody that reads my blog knows me, knows what I love and what I hate. I love photography, space, storms (meteorology in general), computers, technology in general, solving problems, analyzing everything… you know, I’m that genius hidden in inside that young mother body that nobody ever sees because I keep to myself. The people that know me know I just blow people away when they see the real me. I have had many years of being a stay-at-home mom to read and learn everything because when I want to know something, I become an expert in the subject within a week. Nobody at home gives a crap about what I like so I’m very alone. Just as I left my best friend was starting to want to get to know the world of photography, which sucks, because now I have nobody again. I thought for a minute my 11 year old would take an interest in it, but I think because they see me always with my camera gear, they have no interest, like I overwhelm them or something. I could also use a business partner. I can’t run a business by myself, not in photography, it’s too hard. So until I get fully settled I have a pause in business. I have to have new cards made, set up my site, etc. I’m already registered in Florida as: Photography by Jennifer, L.L.C. but until I get some clients here it means nothing. I can’t even do aerials until my never home and never seen other being Matt renews his pilots license. Speaking of Matt, we went to the Atlas V launch the other night in Port Canaveral and he pissed me off. He’s the NASA lover but seemed like he didn’t want to even be bothered. What an upset. I enjoyed my time because thankfully other people arrived and I chatted with them while he stayed a loner off to the side. Pics that haven’t been touched yet at the end of this post.
When we first arrived my mom and brother came with us to help us move. Mom hasn’t left but I kicked Paul out. My niece Rachel also came along and our relationship improved a great amount. This child from the day of her birth until a couple days after we moved here, almost 9 years, NEVER spoke a word to me. Why? I dunno. She speaks to everyone else. We went from that, to bonding and having conversations overnight. She stayed up with me when I couldn’t sleep (or tried too anyway!). So I cried when my brother ripped her out of here to go back to Michigan because he’s a selfish a-hole. I told her she’s welcome back here anytime she wants, including her mother. Now I’m just bored out of my mind.
I was excited to move here because of the thunderstorms daily. I was like wow, finally, I don’t have to wait months between good lightning storms for photography. I no longer have to sit and stare at the forecasts in any hope a storm will pass through. What sucks though is, since we got here, the storms happen at stupid times of the day where I can’t get out to photograph them. Our last night time lightning event happened like a week after we moved here and we were busy with stuff and I couldn’t leave to take pics.
I did go out and buy me a nice lightning trigger for my camera, which will definitely take the stress out of shooting lighting. If you’ve never done it, trust me, it can bring tears to your eyes. This device cost $299 and I accidentally bought 2 so I have a spare now. Now I just need the opportunity. My trigger will trigger my camera on light, sound, motion, and laser so I think I can find creative ways to use it. I still want and need better “glass” (aka lens) I need a great zoom lens. The one I have now is just severely incompetant. My pics of the the Atlas V launch site would have been so much better if I had a better telephoto lens. Of course, the amount of haze (humidity) in the air would impair any photograph at long range. The photo still looks awesome, but lacks in details as everything is softened out.
[PICS WILL GO HERE SOON WHEN I WATERMARK THEM]
My darn back hurts, I think it’s a pinched nerve because it travels from my hip to my knee. I’ve never had back pain like this before but hopefully it goes away. At the launch a couple days ago I had to go sit down a couple times. I also still have an uncasted broken hand. I try to keep it stabilized as much as possible (not possible shooting photos) and stupid me keeps like re-breaking it. It hurts like hell but oh well, i’ll get into a doc soon I hope. It’s been broke for about 6 weeks now, especially my right pinky finger, which is pointing in an unnatural direction, lol.
My new house is great, it’s 5 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms, enough for any person. My only complain is there is no storage space. My garage is still filled to the brim with boxes, and my most important daily asset next to my camera, my juicer. I can’t find it and so help me god if it got left behind……. ugh. I have a 30′ in-ground pool, which is nice. I’ll post pics of that soon as well.
Well, after a few motherly duties I will come back to write more and post pics later….
